I am happy to report

The records of impending demise as a result of severe neurosis were highly...suspect.

In honor:

And now, a word from our Sponsor, 2010 edition

While I'm not campaigning to be the world's greatest eccentric -- heaven forbid with the likes of Daniel Johnston and Michelle Bachmann milling about, I'd have about as much credence in that role as a two-legged pachyderm.

But! But I do have at least one quirk I'm happy to divulge and take the infamy/log into the running for contemporary log lady supreme.